Friday, December 26, 2008

World War Z - As True as Story as any Other

Here's a short post cuz it's a holiday for me. And look...I've had time to READ.

If you haven't read it you simply must investigate a spectacular piece of literature called World War Z. No matter what your opinion of zombies or Armageddon or post-apocalyptic nightmares may be this book is most definitely worth your time. It's a 12 hour read, if you're hungry and how many episodes of fill in the blank can you watch in that amount of time, anyway?

Don't like to read? Read this.
Hate zombies cuz they're stupid? It's not about "zombies" .... it's an extended metaphor.
Don't like gore? This is more political than gory.
Can't afford it? Ask around and borrow it.
Think it's for geeks? Only geeks who like to study the human psyche and spirit.
Figure it's another bit of pulp some Hollywood dork will just turn into the next blockbuster starring some old fart like Bruce Willis? Not a chance. Well, not the first part. This is not pulp, despite the recent resurgence of zombie pulp covering the bookshelves. And here's hoping to the supreme light that Hollywood just leaves this one alone! (As if.)

Now, if the Brits got their hands on it and turned it into a mini-series, we could talk. They did such a stellar job with (WARNING GORY IMAGERY) Dead Set.

This book is a collection of interviews from around the globe after a 10 year pandemic destroys most of our planet. Billions of people dead. Some undead, some killed by their own governments, some killed in combat, some suicides. Grim stuff but brilliant stuff, nonetheless.

Max Brooks where have you been hiding? WTF that this is your first "novel"? WTF? That I should be so talented to come up with this! And, damn, it's smart. SMART. Thank the supreme blast of energy that you're at least 36 years of age because if you were any younger I'd lose my poo. That means I'm not too far off from accomplishing something significant like this book.

(I'm supposed to write a book, see? And I keep hearing that you have to write from your expereince. CLEARLY THAT IS A LOAD OF DUMP! It's not like this Max Brooks guy can have possibly lived any of THIS? Come on. So now I know I can write a book and it can be about anything. I wish I wrote this book. I do, I do!)

Er...yeah, the book.... eerily prophetic. And retrospective at the same time (I think those things go hand in had anyways). And proof that when it comes, whatever it is, whenever it is, we will not be prepared. We're too cocky to be prepared. We're kind of too sure we'd be prepared to be prepared. We're too busy navel gazing and spitting over the fence of our neighbours and shooting snuff films and buying stuff we don't need and watching Survivor and stuff....

This book scared the poo out of me. Not because there were zombies eating folk - whatever. Seen it a thousand times in a thousand movies and graphic novels and whatever. It was scary because every reaction, every proposed solution, every possible retaliation or evasion or ANYTHING we could come up with was mostly USELESS.

I'm so rambling in this post but who cares? You could be reading the book instead of reading this post, you know?

Max Brooks thought of everything! You don't think so? I dare you to read it and come up with a solution to the zombie problem that wasn't already covered. I don't care who you are or where you come from...Brooks has got you covered. It's like this guy went into a trance and transported himself to different places on Earth and envisioned a swarm of zombies coming at him. He transmogrified into a citizen of every country he could think of. Every region on our planet. The most remote locations. He's a soldier. He's a soccer mom. He's a sensei. He's a minister. He's in Chile. In Japan. In Slovakia. In Antarctica. In Canada. In North Korea. In France. He planned. He stragegy-ized. He armed. Every piece of technology he could think of. Small armies. Large armies. Traps. Dogs. Water. Trenches. Battle axes. Heavy metal.

Anything you can think of he covered.

And it's all for naught. The zombies just keep coming. Under water. Outer space. Under ground. Over hill and dale. In a Chippendales! (Okay not in a Chippendales.)

And let me tell you something else before you say "OUTER SPACE?! COME ON NOW YOU'RE TALKING PULP FICTION FOR SHIZZLE!...Before you say that, think about it...some government somewhere would eventually put a team out there so HUSH. The book is INSANELY realistic. So real it will scare the poo out of you too, Shmoo. The creepiest part about it is that it could happen. Oh, maybe not the walking dead could happen. No matter what the military system, political system, cultural system....ANY SYSTEM any where on the planet....NO SYSTEMS....there's some poor schmuk telling his/her tale from that particular perspective. And it's terrifying.

But surely a country as populated as China can take on a mass of zombies? No.
But surely the Arctic is a safe haven? Nope.
But surely a country with nulcear weapons? LOL.
But surely people pulled together and strategy-ized and .... and.... not so much.

This is one of the most gripping, couldn't put it down, eerie, creepy books I have......Yeah yeah, you've heard this all before just read it already.


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